Body Image. Self Love.

What do you see when you look in the mirror? Do you compare yourself to those in magazines or even to your closest friends? Do you feel you are not worthy? 

Before I started my journey I hated looking in the mirror. I didn't like the reflection that I was staring back at me. I hated the stretch marks. I hated to fat on my body. I hated my face. I hated everything. I always compared myself to my friends and wondered how they could be friends with a person like me. I hated being fat but yet I didn't do anything about it. 

How can one go on with life though by avoiding the mirror as much as possible? How do you not compare yourself and feel like a fake with those around you?

As time passed I learned to love that reflection that I hated so much. It wasn't just because there was a fat person staring back at me before, but I soon came to realize it was because I didn't love myself for who I was. I didn't want to look at that person because I didn't know who she was anymore. However, once I began to love myself and embrace the person I was, looking at the reflection wasn't a challenge any longer. I was finally okay with looking in the mirror and smiling at the reflection staring back at me.

As part of my prepping for an upcoming competition, I have to self evaluate myself and to do this it requires a mirror to do so. I need to be able to look hard at the person standing there and be true to myself and what I see. Answering questions like "Am I overweight?", "What are my strong points/body parts?", "What are my weak point/body parts?" and "How is my attitude and confidence level?". I have only written the answers to these questions down once, but I have strategically placed the full length mirror that I purchased in my room right where I get dressed on a daily basis. This way I have to force myself to look and evaluate where my body is at on that given moment. What my body looks like after losing 94 pounds and how I feel about it. I know these questions by heart, so I ask them to myself in my head and answer them. I see the weak parts that need work and are that are making progress and I see the strong parts that make me smile because they show the hard work I have already put in. 

I have come to "embrace" and not "accept" how my body looks. I have stretch marks because I nurtured and grew two amazing boys in my stomach for 9 months but I also have stretch marks due to weight gain. I also have an extra pooch in my stomach area for this same reason. Will I ever have an amazing 6 pack, probably not, but it doesn't matter to me. I embrace my thick legs because my legs allow me to run like the wind. I embrace my hips even though they are wide and crooked, but they are mine and helped me birth 2 boys.

So back to the point, what is self love? How do we learn to love ourselves and not compare ourselves to others? How can we improve our body image?

We have to realize what is important and what isn't. We learn to care less about what others are thinking about us and more about what we think of ourselves. We realize how far we have come from that first step, whatever it might be. Then we can smile because we are truly proud of ourselves and the person that we've fought to become. We realize that WE ARE ENOUGH!!

Some ways to improve body image:

1. Don't focus on what other peoples bodies look like
2. Do focus on what you EMBRACE about your appearance
3. Each day, say ONE thing that you like about yourself
4. Focus on accomplishments that have to do with who you are a person, not what you look like
5. Understand that things we see in print or on TV have been altered to perfection, everything is NOT as it seems
6. You don't need validation from anyone else to feel good about YOU
7. No one is perfect, so EMBRACE the fact that you have flaws and LOVE the things that make you UNIQUE
8. Surround yourself with people who support you and make you feel GOOD about yourself
9. Do what makes you HAPPY
10. LOVE YOURSELF the way you are right now, not what or who you could be

We should be thankful for what our bodies are able to accomplish every day. We need to embrace 100% of our inner and outer beauty. No one else can have the same beauty as you, so embrace it. Take it with the smile every morning when you wake up alive for another day. 

I've heard far too many women belittle themselves, not give themselves enough credit, complain about their flaws, wish for things without the mental mindset to achieve them. I feel like as women we need to rally together and remind each other that WE ARE ENOUGH. You are beautiful, you are a good mother, you are intelligent, you are successful, you are amazing, you are you, and that is ENOUGH. I'm not telling you to stop dreaming or to stop reaching for more, as we should always be doing that, I'm just saying let's change our mindset, and remind ourselves of the good, the beautiful, the amazing women we are, and soon enough, a positive mind will breed a POSITIVE LIFE!