Monday, June 6, 2016

Truth Post - Mind Over Scale

So I have done a lot of thinking lately and I have to make a truth and finally realizing post.

Over the course of my journey, I relied on the scale to measure my success. I did use the shrinking sizes in my clothes, but I used the scale as a reasoning for everything. When I first started I didn't own a scale and I went months without weighing myself because I didn't want to know. I knew my starting point from my most recent physical with my doctor and that was all I needed to know. However, I purchased a scale about 6 months in to take part in a challenge with some friends and it all went down hill from there.

I became obsessed with the scale. I would weigh myself almost every other day to see what the number would say. When the numbers were up I was pissed off for what could have caused that. When the numbers were down I was ecstatic because I felt good and what I was doing was working. It was a never ending battle with the numbers on the scale and letting the scale rule my journey.

Some days I felt like I needed those numbers in order for me to make sure I was on track to the goals I had set for myself. I would tell people that the journey isn't about what the scale says but I didn't believe that so how could I tell others that. I would tell people to hide their scales, but there again, mine wasn't hiding and I used it more than I should. I needed the scale and I relied on it way to much.

In November 2015, I hit 160 pounds and I was thrilled with that. Still at that point, I would still weigh myself constantly. I mentally wanted to see how much lower that number could go even though it didn't need to go any lower. I was a healthy person and I didn't need that scale to move anymore. Yes, at one point since then, I have hit 158 pounds but that didn't stick around and I have been beating myself up over it trying to figure out why I can't get back to that number. Again, using that scale as my reasoning for everything.

So here I am 3 years later and with recent re-evaluations I have finally hit the mentality that I should have hit a long time ago. I don't need the scale to track my progress. I don't need to weigh myself everyday to see change. I am finally mentally and emotionally comfortable with whatever that scale might say because it isn't a concern right now for me. With my goals currently of leaning, toning, and building muscle for a future figure competition, I have to focus on the way my body is changing and not the numbers on the scale.

My body is happy with where it is right now weight wise and so am I. The 160's is where my body is thriving with change and it is where it will stay. Having taken recent photos and doing my usual photo comparisons I can see change in my body without the scale moving a whole lot. The measurements prove it too. How do I know that I have mentally changed? Well the old me would be wondering why the numbers on the scale and on the tape measure didn't move much over the last 4 months with the amount of work I have put in on nutrition and workouts. The new mentally and emotionally happy me though was thrilled with the change on the tape measure regardless of the fact that the scale hasn't moved.

To give you an idea:

Measurements in Pounds1/11/20165/27/2016Month Loss
Weight164.8162.22.6
Measurements in Inches
Bust/Chest3635.50.5
Waist31.5310.5
Hips41.9401.9
L Thigh2223-1
R Thigh22.523.5-1
L Bicep1112-1
R Bicep11.512.25-0.75
0
-0.85
Totals
Total Inches176.4177.25

Mentally, seeing the inches go up on my thighs and biceps would have triggered me to rethink what the hell happened over the last 4 months to have an increase. However, I know that this increase isn't from weight gain or from fat. This increase is from me building muscle. The decrease in other areas is also from the work I have put in over 4 months. My body is reacting to all of the nutrition that I am fueling it with and the busting butt in boxing class and weight lifting sessions. I honestly was thrilled to see this numbers because even though they are small they are a result of the work I have put in consistently with determination. 

These photos can show that the scale doesn't matter. In both of the older photos I was weighing about 160 pounds and in the photos taken yesterday, I was also weighing about 160 pounds. But look at the definition, the way my skin has tightened, and the way my body is taking shape. This is how I have come to realize that I don't need to scale to move because my body has changed so much over the past few months. I am sticking with my nutrition, I am consistently working out, and I am still changing.






















I can't say that I no longer weigh myself because that would be a lie. I do occasional checks but not everyday like I was previously. Now it is about every other week just for a little check in. Right now, my focus has to be on just sticking to my current routine and continuing to see change. The scale will not rule my progress any longer. 


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